Dear friends and family,
Tonight I had
the pleasure of walking, on this beautiful warm spring day, from our
home to the evening prayer service at Marywood. It is the
last evening prayer of lent and the dark contemplative service was just what I needed.
My friend,
Mary, preached a wonderful homily and my neighbor, Bob, had prepared a
moving film tribute for all the sisters who have died in the past couple
of years. As a photo of each sister was presented, it was
easy to see the unique beauty of each individual. Many
had been leaders, teachers, nurses, professors, social workers,
community organizers, among other professions.
Some were serious, others jokesters, some sweet, others zealous.
All were dedicated to living generous lives.
So, lent is
almost over. Giving up my colon for lent (as I like to
joke) has had its rewards. Mainly, this year, my
intertwined lenten and medical journey have made me feel a renewed
appreciation for life and for relationships. Both
are worth time and care.
My days now include work, nap, run around at
home, sleep, work, nap, run around at home, sleep, repeat. It
feels so good to be active and engaged with projects beyond my physical
self. I swear, work is good for the soul.
While my soul
is thriving, my body still demands some attention as well. My
next surgery is scheduled for April 23. This surgery will
“take down” the ileo-ostomy and connect my new fake colon with my small
bowel. Believe it or not, I am really looking forward to
this surgery.
When I was young, I used to
love to climb onto the top of the tractor and lay down on my stomach. My
dad would remove the gas cap and begin to fill the tank. I
would strategically stick my nose near
the flow of the fumes and sniff away. I unabashedly loved
the smell of gasoline.
I know there
are other gasoline smell lovers out there. Does it
correlate with left-handedness?
If you remember life 40 years ago, you recall
how there was no notion of good or bad foods, cigarettes were not yet
studied, seat belts were barely invented and never used, and the term
“politically correct” was not yet on
anyone’s mind. Who knows what endless summer days of
happily smelling gas fumes did to my brain? All I know is
that it was glorious.
That’s how I view this upcoming surgery.
Who knows what rigors I will have to endure while in the
hospital or how my new plumbing will work after the fact. All
I know for sure is that it will be fantastic to not have an ostomy any
more. I am going to anticipate and then wallow in the
satisfaction of this one guilty pleasure
that the surgery will bring... a flat tummy that will no longer make
oinking sounds.
I’m praying that the surgery goes well, of
course, and that the date won’t be delayed. Right now
there is the possibility that the abscess that had to be drained, then
was healed, might well be back. I am having pain in the
very area but no fever and no “egg” sitting... just pain. I
had a CT scan last night and am awaiting the results. I
saw the surgeon on Monday and he said they would most likely try to
treat it with antibiotics and not by re-inserting
the drain. What I am learning is that this recovery
process allows for armfuls of hope while demanding
truckloads of patience.
My prayers today are personal in hopes that I
remove walls I sometimes put up regarding relationships. My prayers are also for all of us
hoping to connect, to build bridges of understanding,
and to care more deeply. I pray for all of us world
citizens and neighbors to be good listeners when there are differences. I
pray for all the Dominican sisters, and others, who have made building
of relationships and community their
life’s work.
Happy
Holy Week and Easter,
Marcia
c) Marcia Good, 2010